Use one of these excuses to explain your poor darts performance at the bar.
Having an off night throwing darts at the bar?
It’s not because you suck at darts. There must be some other reason, right?
Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered.
For generations, darts players have been coming up with excuses for why they’re terrible at the game of darts on occasion.
Some excuses are pretty generic. I’m tired, for example. Or it’s been a long day. Yada yada yada.
But there are also plenty of valid (or at least valid sounding) excuses that may work for other bar games but are uniquely crafted for darts.
We’ve compiled a list of 20 of the best darts excuses to explain why you’re having such an off night.
These darts excuses are tried and true, so feel free to use when necessary.
1. I’ve had too much to drink
This is an obvious one, but still a perfectly viable excuse for your sloppy darts.
Too much booze can wreak havoc on your accuracy. Drinking too much can also explain your surprisingly poor math skills when scoring games of 301 and 501.
2. I haven’t had enough to drink
The opposite of number 1, this excuse is often the case for those of us who need a little lubrication before we can get in our darts groove.
3. It’s too cold in here
Some bars are just always cold. And it’s certainly harder to throw darts in a frigid environment.
Your hands are cold; your joints are stiff. You can even see your breath. This is a valid excuse for why you can’t even hit the board.
4. It’s too warm in here
On the other hand, the bar may just be a bit too hot and humid for your liking. And sweat can cause some major darts mishaps. Make sure they turn on the AC. But see above.
5. I’m not used to these darts (shafts, flights, barrels, etc.)
With all the variations in steel tip darts, using a different set of darts can cause major problems.
Whether it’s the length of the shaft, the shape and weight of the barrel, the strange and uncomfortable knurled grip pattern, or the size of the flight, if you typically throw with your own darts at home, the bar set might not be up your standards.
6. I can’t get used to this lighting
Is it too dark or too bright? Are there distracting lights or reflections? All very common and valid reasons for your poor dartsmanship.
You may just need some more time to adjust to the lighting before you start landing ton-80’s.
7. I went to the gym earlier
Doing curls or bench presses before your darts match? Good for you. Your friends will be impressed. After all, darts alone will not do much for your physique.
But all that lifting will made your arms tired, and now your darts form is compromised.
8. I haven’t played in a while
This is an easy one that can be used for just about any bar game.
I’m a little rusty. Haven’t been practicing much. Haven’t played 501 in years. You name it, these are all perfectly good reasons for your lack of accuracy and consistency.
9. The music is too loud
Or maybe it’s just not your style. If they’re blaring techno or blasting tunes from the 80’s, it can really screw up your game. The opposite may also be true; i.e. “it’s too quiet in here”.
10. I didn’t get to warm up
This one comes up in league play quite a bit.
If you’re running late, you may have missed some valuable pregame warm-up time. You need to work out the kinks before throwing darts that count.
11. I’m distracted by the game(s)
If your favorite team is on TV, and it’s a close one, darts might not be enough to hold your attention.
And if you’re at a sports bar, the darts match might be competing with 50 other screens. Focusing on your cricket match becomes a near impossibility.
12. The dartboard’s off center
The board may be positioned too far to the left or right. Or it’s too high or low.
Either way, a sloppy dartboard setup may be the reason you’re a couple inches off your targets. You’ll now need to adjust your stance and alignment to accommodate for these mistakes.
13. The darts are sticky
Bar darts get spilled on. Dropped on the floor. Grabbed by sweaty or filthy hands. If you have some sticky darts, your release will pay the price. Make sure you use plenty of hand sanitizer too.
14. The ceiling is too low
A low ceiling is not ideal for your darts form. This is especially true of you like to throw with an arc, as is the case when you use darts with larger flights.
A low ceiling can also be a visual distraction during your release. Time to find a new place to play darts. Or just get used to it.
15. I’m not used to playing with soft tip darts
Many bars have replaced the bristle dartboards of old with fancy new electronic dartboards and soft tip dart sets.
Using these newfangled safety darts may throw you off your game a little. Plus, soft tip darts tend to bounce out more often than steel tip darts.
At least that’s one reason you can’t seem to close out that 20.
16. The floor is uneven
An uneven floor or loose carpet can do real harm to your otherwise perfect darts stance.
If the floor is causing you to lean a little or change your weight distribution, you will have a much harder time throwing straight.
Or maybe you should just go back to excuse #1. Because the floor is actually perfectly level.
17. My shirt’s too tight
Wearing your muscle shirt to the bar? More power to you. But good luck throwing darts. That tight shirt might restrict your throwing motion a little bit. Be sure to let everyone know.
18. I need my glasses
But I didn’t know you wore glasses? Your response: Only when I throw darts. Or, you’re not wearing your contact lenses. Harder to argue with that one.
19. My allergies are killing me
That’s right. Just blame it on allergy season. Your itchy eyes, lethargy, constant sniffles and sneezing are definitely bringing you down this evening.
20. I let you win
The final entry on our list of darts excuses, this is the classic excuse of “I let you win” or “I wasn’t trying”. You’re obviously a superior darts player, so this is really the only plausible explanation for your consecutive losses.
You just want everyone to have fun.